ROCK OF AGES in Manila

Zen and the Art of Naming Projects

Dearest Arkeofilms,

Eureka. Counterstrike. Freedom. Excellence. Those are nice project names. I understand some of those projects land on our laps with their names already predetermined. It’s just that there are head-scratching moments when I wonder how a company in the creative industry can name a project that involves milk as “Milk” or call a baloon project “Hot Air.” I mean, c’mon guys, I know there is a better way to call a project about cars “Shine.”

Ever since a particular project required a heavy dose of “Patience,” we have been conscious about using words that eventually describe our feelings toward that project. That’s why there are no projects called “Forever” or “Achilles” or, god help us, “Purgatory.” “Surmountable” is a beautiful word and has a positive ring to it. That’s a good start. Having said that, I now suggest a list of words that we can adopt for naming projects.

How about astronomical or astrological? “Aquarius,” “Taurus,” “Sagittarius.” “Cassiopeia” “Orion” or “Perseus” Space Shuttle names are nice. “Endeavor” “Discovery” although that one blew up, and we can’t use “Atlantis” because that continent sunk. “Hubble” sounds like a ‘bubble,’ so that’s a bust.

Scientific/Technical. “Evolution” or “Quantum” or “Singularity” or “Gamma Ray” but warning on the use of “Gravity,” unless it’s “Antigravity;” no “Distortion,” and “Black Hole.”

Botanical. “Sequoia” “Mahogany” “Orchid” “Bamboo.” I’m surprised we haven’t used Bamboo yet, despite its virtues. However, no “Anthuriums” or “Yellow Bells,” or worse, “Baby’s Breath.”

Historical. “Supremo (Bonifacio)” “Columbus” or “Magellan” or Biblical: “Ziggurat” “Ark” or “Beatitude”

TV. “Community” “True Blood (using that spelling)”

Military. “Commander.” “Admiral.” “Battleship.” “Vanguard.”

Mythological. “Hercules.” “Apollo.” “Athena.” “Hydra” but not “Colossus” since it can suggest something overwhelming.

Film. “Amelie.” “Fight Club,” “Moonraker,” “Nemo” or even “Bambi.” I dare we use “Munchausen” or “Scissorhands.”

Caveat on anything Shakespearean.

Sci-Fi. We already did “Jedi”. Maybe we can try Star Trek and add “Vulcan,” “Enterprise,” or “Starship.” Or BSG: “Galactica.” Should The Empire return, we still have “Padawan,” “Amidala” and “Light Saber.”

Sure there are still numerous verbs, adjectives and adverbs that are far from inducing chagrin. “Supremacy” “Splendor” “Graceful” “Vivify” “Proclaim” “Ascendance” “Magnificent” “Dominance” “Eminence” “Sovereign” “Synthesis” or simple but meaningful nouns like “Tower” or “Motor.”

When in doubt, there’s Thesaurus.com. There’s an endless list of words we can use as project names. But by golly, I hope there’s no more “Bee” “Pasko” lest we again go down that road that is “Kajam” or worse, “Words.” Please.