Four eyes

Four eyes. I could call this entry by other names like Bedazzled or Mine Eyes Have Seen the Glory. But yesterday after a very long day with the relatives, I got my my eyes a new pair of glasses.

Six week since getting sick with TB, I have reorganized my priorities. At the top of that is to have my eyes check for ageist wear and tear. I have been putting that off for a while despite suspecting that they have been causing my headaches at work after long bouts in fron of the monitor. So, yesterday I decided to have my eyes checked.

I dunno why I chose to go to The Optical Shop, since Sarabia was just a few meters away. “Dito po tayo (This way sir),” said Dr. Marge the Opthalmologist and we went inside a small room with two unnassuming contraptions that seemed they didn’t do much.

First I looked into this thing that looked like it blasted my eyes with kryptonite laser. I didn’t feel any pain, it just looked like it was doing something to each of my eyes as I peered into this eyepiece that showed crosshairs in a range of focus. I thought I went into some hack store.

Next I sat in a dentist’s chair-like thingy but instead of drills and whatnot at the ends of its arms it had WALL-E’s eyes. After fitting WALL-E’s eyes over mine, Dr. Marge shut the left eye off ans my right eye was made to read some stuff flashed on the opposite wall.

The thing projected on the wall looked like it had been used in the last 20 years I thought I was being duped. (Well, the checkup is kinda cheap if I hadn’t had my glasses made there, but it’s free when you do. So there’s really not much duping going around, I figure.) The first lines of letters and shapes I managed to read. The next lines barely made sense, some of them looked like organized doodles by an adult. But I barely read them correctly, let alone read anything at all. “Is that an R… a Z and an R?,” I ask. I was beginning to get frustrated. The doctor kept assuring me it was okay. And then she closed WALL-E’s right eye and turned on the left. I was floored.

The same projections on the walls were crisp-clear letters and shapes, projected by a computer mounted on the chair I was sitting in. I could read everything and recognize the shapes. I was nearly dumbstruck. “Your left is 20/20,” said Dr. Marge, “but your right is /25. You thought there was nothing wrong because so far, the left had been compensating for the right.” It made so much sense I almost cried.

My eyes are my bread and butter, and many people have coomplimented my work for having a great sense of detail and a firm grasp of design aesthetics. That could all go if I were to lose my eyesight and my greatest fear is to go blind.

The doctor made me walk around the shop wearing a lightweight version of WALL-E’s eyes. After confirming that I indeed was able to read better and farther, I was motioned over to the shelves to choose frames. Doctor tells attendant something and Nifty Attendant hands over to me a pair. I like them a lot. I look at the tag and see that they’re Guccis and I don’t like them anymore. I ask for something similar but cheaper. Nifty Attendant hands me some other frames but she tells me to get the Gucci because it had a 25% markdown. I say no but I end up not liking the others she gave me. I look around and try the colored ones. I get the feeling I’ll end up getting the Guccis. I did.

Next was choosing the type of lens which was much easier. Dr. Marge gave me the rundown on three types, their price ranges and their advantages. I got the Gucci frames, so I went the whole nine yards.

I don’t have a punchline to end this entry, except that an ahour after my checkup, I was walking around the mall wearing my new pair.


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